STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING NOW!
Yikes! OK, OK, I put down my orange cookie. What's on your little mind?Okay. This isn't part of the story, but I'm confused. I'm seeing some people say Lavos is in Fourside.
I've seen people say he's in Saturn Valley.
WHERE THE HECK IS LAVOS? IF IDON'T FIND OUT SOON, I'M GOING TO GET MAD!
No! PLEASE! ANYTHING but that! Don't get mad please we can't bear it :(
...or something? I guess? I'm not sure exactly what reaction he was hoping to elicit from his readers. Assuming there are any.
If he had obtained enlightenment by now, he'd realize it makes no difference where Lavos is.
Post #947, by Anthadd
After grimacing over the Mammoth Burger he was forced to eat, Anthadd pondered the ways he could escape the Lost Underworld, being trapped, essentially, with no Teleport PSI users at the ready.
Obviously there is only one way to escape the Lost Underworld: You must learn PSI Teleport. We already know, because you tipped us off in the first, or "topic", sentence, that you are going to spend the rest of the post doing exactly that.While in the Lost Underworld, he thought it quite a brilliant idea to acquire the Fire Springs, should it be rebuilt by now, had it been destroyed.
That's the first reference to Falcon24's silly "Sound Sapper" I've seen in, I don't know, 500 posts?Anthadd neared the rock that was, essentially, the prophet of the Tendas.
"You wish to escape, do you not?"
"Are you psychic or something? Yes, psychic ability has been neither proven nor disproven, but I have a feeling that it does exist, as I do believe extraterrestrial life and most of the mythical monsters believed to live in the various lakes to exist."
"You're a mouthful, and then some. And as you so indirectly answered me through another question, I will inform you as to the proper method of escape. By now, the Fire Springs has recovered, and you may acquire its power. Then, return here, and I will bestow upon you the power of PSI Teleport Alpha."
Ohhh, a fetch quest! I love those!Anthadd set off to leave, but the rock spoke once more.
"Wait. I have hidden below me weapons and defensive items. Take them. Your acting alone suggests you require them."
Oh, come on, just buy the damn things from the guy that's standing like ten feet to your right."No. There may be someone weaker than I, acting alone as well, who will have greater need of those items."
"Fine, be that way," the rock muttered. And Anthadd walked off in a southwesterly direction.
My first thought was maybe he's inviting someone else to tag along, but if so he just insulted whoever might do so by calling them weaker than himself. Nobody's going for that bait. Now I guess he's just kind of showing how generous he is.
Post #948, by murkkie
"Well, are there any "Your Santuary" locations left?" Andrew asked. [Well, first we have to get out of this pit] Mog replied as he stared up at the opening of the hole seven feet above them.
Mog's in at least two, maybe three places at the same time right now. I don't know that murkkie's going to make it as an IF poster.[This message has been edited by murkkie (edited 05-10-2000).]
Post #949, by SirMontyG
"Nowhere to go, Scruffy.." Evil Sir told me in almost a singing voice. I was completly terrified at my own death, and at the hands of myself! But then I remembered what he had told me a little while ago: that I was fighting for my confidence! I understood what to do
"Like heck there isn't!!" That's when I pulled a matrix.
I don't have a foggy clue why Major Asshole suddenly switched to the hideously bad first person narration.I jumped strait up, grabed the stall's divider, and skimmed the tops of the stalls close enough to jump to the door. Evil spewed lead at an incredible rate, and got my tux a few times, but I made it to the door and ran to the wester wing of the facility unscathed.
"Ahhh, this is gonna be good!" Evil laughed and quickly persued.
"Seeing that this is my mind.." While running for my life, I consintrated on a gameshark code giving me a PP7 that could blast open any door, and it worked! The other half of the bulding was now at my disposal.
He's still treating this like a lucid dream. Wait, is this even Magicant anymore?Evil Sir, realizing the code after seeing the door blown down at the end of the corridor, desided to make a code for himself
"Ha ha, try consintraiting with THIS! SOUND GLITCH!!!"
Desided? Consintraiting? Did he hire loid on as a special guest writer for this post?The music changed from Take Five to a garbled version of the game music. I remember seeing this code on the net, trying it once, and never trying it again. Unfotunatly, my bad side remembered that to. This wouldn't be a problem, but the noise is so distracting! I couldn't consentrate, and therefore couldn't change wepons or anything. He was now in control.
"Sirrrr...come out come out...c'mon, nobody likes a COWARD!"
True, but then again, nobody really likes a corpse either."NNNnnnn...must concentrate...Ah ha!" I said in a low voice
I then thought about all the ACs who had made this island possible. I realized that this would sound corny, but maybe the island was really only created due to the power of all of our thoughts, goals, and dreams put together..But the poit was, I began to think about all the cool AC's that made all this possible, and realized that, on the physical plane, DarkTon and Evil Kyio would not be easy to defeat. I thought about this, harder, harder, over the music, over the noise, over everything! I could consentrate.
The evil entity walked through the door facing the gas tank room.
"Ahh, James, so glad you could make it."
Evil, being a sport, tagged along.
"It was too easy, Alec."
"Well, half of everything is luck, Evil."
"And the other half, Sir?"
"Confusion!" I clicked a button on my watch, and blew up all the gas tanks in the building, causing a green haze to eminate in the room. "Beaten at your own game, buddy!" and I shimmied out the convaor belt route to the outside
"No! Must...Escape...Wait!" Evil stoped for a moment and concentrated..
On the outside, I looked down to see that I was holding a gas mask. He was going to escape.
I don't know. None of this has the slightest relevance to anything and it doesn't really belong in IF, but it's pretty amusing to read anyway. I'd be more minded to give Liyoshi a pass if he wrote something that at least mildly entertained me."SIR! WHERE'D YOU RUN TO? QUIT HIDING AND SHOW YOURSELF!!" although alive, Evil desperatly gasped for air. He stood outside the platform on the runway.
"For England, buddy!" I muddered to myself as I launched a round from the tank parked out back.
Well, it's his own fault if he was too stupid to see that coming.Evil Sir's eyes became huge.
An explosion could be heard for miles.
The static noise stopped.
He was defeated.
And then I woke up. No big power gains, level up, new PSI moves, I just woke up. But I did have one new atribute: understanding. I realized who I was and what I should do. My goals were clear, my mind set, and I was going to accomplish what I set out to do. Defeat DarkTom and Evil Kyio. Of course after that, I hadn't a clue what to do, but I realized that if I understood everything, descovery, and therefore life itself would mean nothing. Heh, I guess I did get a lot out of that..
Wait, what? Dark Tom? Is that a racial slur?
Post #950, by PSIOsman
(Okay, the story at this point is getting a bit stroppy... hehehe, that's Skye's word.
Steve Irwin's, actually. Poor Steve has been dead for going on five years now.I believe Lavos is in Saturn Valley, and the only ones that can defeat him arethe chosen four, right? So that leaves us (the ACs) fighting the Randite Statues. Correct me if I'm wrong...)
If you say so, I guess. Except we still don't know what the f--- Randite Statues are or why the f--- we should care about them.Siris studied the area around Lavos for a moment.
"Hmmm... it seems that there is some type of shield around Lavos. It looks to be impenetrable, but... wait! Look" Siris pointed at the wrecked eye of Lavos. The image of Ness appearedin it.
Well, that's definitely a job for Liyoshi, Master of Shields."It looks like the only ones who can destroy the thing is Ness, Paula, Jeff and Poo. But what do we do now?" Asked Osman.
He's trying to come up with an in-story justification for going along with Tengu Man's edict, but failing. Why does seeing something that looks vaguely like Ness on Lavos's shield definitely mean no one except Ness and people who personally know him can defeat him? That's stupid."Wait. If, like, Falcon summoned Lavos, and like, he's not here, wouldn't Lavos be, like, dead?" Asked Alan.
"You're right... Something else must be controlling him!"
Also stupid and nonsense. No explanation is offered as to why Lavos has to be under anyone's control at all.On the cliffs surrounding Saturn Valley, a Randite opened its glowing red eyes looked down at the consumer of worlds that him and his brethren had summoned.
Randites have glowing red eyes now?
Between this and how happily he went along with Tengu Man's demands, I have to belatedly conclude PSIOsman must have been a Tenguling.He saw the beings and read their intentions. The plan could not be disrupted. He would have to eliminate the threat. The statue pulled itself up to its full twelve-foot height. He jumped over the side of the cliffs as if it were a mere stone. The razor sharp claws on the ends of his grey fingers glowed with an unearthly light....
Yeah. Definitely a Tenguling. Tengu Man might have written that paragraph himself.------------------
You may address me as His Majesty Emperor PSIOsman I.
He left his sig block on.
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